Wednesday, December 25, 2013

CPS Child Protective Services or Criminal Parental Slaughter

In my line of work, I meet a wide variety of individuals and I hear it all. Sometimes I am amazed at the stories I hear from individuals; though they may sound impossible to believe, after I’ve heard what I assume might be a far-fetched story, I do some fact-checking to check the veracity of the story.

One such story is that of a woman’s struggle with a federally funded State agency (CPS) who wielded an incredible amount of power over a seemingly innocent woman which literally tore her family apart. The story is featured in a book that I wrote about that woman’s quest for love and happiness, Forever Bea: I married a psychopath in search of my soul mate.

The story, as hard as it is to believe, unfolds to show how a (possibly even well-intentioned) phone call can absolutely destroy a family, with armed police at your door, breaking up siblings, placing them in foster homes… lying to the parent(s) and countless atrocities. All under the guise of, “helping the children?”

Well, one does not have to look far to see that any Child Protective agency is simply a money-grubbing machine run by non-parents in a system that promotes broken families for profit. Is this what our government has come to?

One former bureaucrat has come forward, Carol Rhodes author of Friend of the Court, Enemy of the Family, to tell the truth; and the truth will first knock the sense out of you, then it will set you free.

In this factual tell-all book, she delineates countless true life cases that she worked on first handedly, knowing that doing so would cost her the profession that she had so wanted to be a part of (because she thought it was about helping families) her retirement, and risk being labeled a traitor or anarchist.

Being fortunate to not ever cross paths with any governmental system that would muscle its way into the obliteration of my family; the thought never occurred to me that this type of activity would be taking place under the careful watch of our United States system of justice. I was shocked.

What I expected to be a few moments spent on Google to uncover some corroborating data turned into an endless barrage of stories of atrocities; statistics implying that 1 out of 25 children in America are at risk of being investigated and/or abducted by our government? Lawyerly claims that, “CPS literally lies, exaggerates, generates false documents and force you into submission.” The apparent facts rocked the foundations of everything that I believed that my country stood for.

My mind is no longer cloaked in naiveté and I am not certain what the future holds. Will we ever be able to return to the tenets of freedom that we once believed to be the foundation of the United States of America, or will we slowly but surely evolve into something very different?

I won’t take it any further, but encourage you to share your thoughts and stories here for others who are looking for this information to find.

What are your thoughts?

Saturday, December 7, 2013

7 Steps to Youthful Glow, Look 10 to 20 Years Younger - DIY

By Shirli Kieffer

You can look ten to twenty years younger just by following some basic keys to tending to yourself from the neck up.

Some women spend hundreds (if not thousands) of dollars on skin care potions lotions and youth revitalizing remedies that are the result of good marketing. If you’re like me, I have a respect for the women who have started these companies and profit from capitalizing on the lack of self-confidence in other women (because I know some of them, personally, and I love you. Really I do…) but I am resistant to certain types of marketing.

I maintain my youthful appearance, and you can too, just by following these simple steps for recapturing your youthful glow:

  1. Clean Skin
    To clean your skin without depriving it of its natural oils, use a cream cleanser. A cream cleanser will help lock in the skin healthy oils on your face, and will also leave your face moisturized and glowing. Using this type of cleanser will slow the development of fine lines and wrinkles.
  2. Home Steam Facial
    For an inexpensive, spa-like facial just lean yourself over a bowl of steaming hot water! Cover or wrap up your hair, fill any container with really hot water and allow the steam to open and clear your pores! It is soothing and stimulating and very cost effective. Follow up with cold water to close and refresh your pores, then add moisturizer!
  3. Moisturize
    Using a facial moisturizer is one of the best things you can do to enhance your beauty. Even if you have oily skin, it is still a good idea. Apply it every single night before going to sleep. If you have extra dry skin, it is a good idea to also use moisturizer in the morning as well.
  4. Makeup Removal
    Always remove makeup before going to bed. If you sleep with your makeup on, you increase the likelihood you will get acne and blackheads. Makeup can trap dirt and oil on your face. Clean and tone your face every night. Don't forget to add moisturizer when you are finished cleaning.
  5. Pretty Lips
    To improve your lip color application, always apply lip balm first. The lip balm will leave your lips soft and moisturized, and will allow your lip color to go on smoothly. Try using a basic, untinted lip balm so that you don't affect the color of the lipstick or lip gloss you're using.
  6. Lovely Lashes
    To make your eyelashes look thicker, dust them with a coat of loose powder before applying your mascara. Use a small brush to apply a thin layer of translucent powder to your eyelashes, taking care not to get the powder in your eyes. Follow up with a coat of your favorite mascara over the top of the powder.
  7. Beautiful Hair
    For beautiful hair, add oil to your hair care routine. You can make your hair shinier, less frizzy, and mask graying by adding a few drops of oil to your hair every morning. Good oils to use are castor, rosemary, or sesame oils. All of them are cost effective and widely available.
    The value of brushing your hair frequently cannot be underestimated. By brushing it frequently you help distribute the oils in your scalp, just as when you brush a dogs fur, it distributes their oils. So, by brushing frequently you help evenly distribute the oils, vitamins, and minerals throughout your hair, helping it stay healthy as a whole.
No need to spend all that money on the latest whiz-bang beauty products, just follow these simple seven steps, and you, too, can reclaim your own fountain of youth that truly comes from within.

Remember, as beautiful as you may look on the outside, your true glow originates from within. It is important to live your life with passion and purpose as there is no better combatant to the aging process.

Why do some women appear to age at a more rapid rate than others? Common aging contributors include sunlight, smoking, stress, depression and taking anti-depressant medications.

You will find that women who are captured in the media, doing the things they love, helping others, delivering their message and truly embracing their true selves and answering their personal calling(s) often appear younger than their contemporaries. We all could learn a lesson from them.

If it seems that getting out from under the doldrums might be a bit of a stretch for you, seek help; a friend to act as an accountability partner, a therapist, counselor or life coach, and get back on the right road to being the best (and youngest) you that you can be.

Get back on track and let me know how your travels go.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Is it Better to Report a Rape or Remain Silent?

By Shirli Kieffer

According to Bea Davison (a, here, unnamed woman) had, "immediately gone to the Police and reported her incident and she knew the man’s name, where he lived… and that he was married. She told me how they took her to the hospital to do a, 'rape kit,' and examination, including stripping her down to her bare skin, probing her violations, and photographing every part of her body. Then she had to meet with a psychologist who interviewed her.  She intimated that she felt that many of the questions she had to answer were insulting, if not downright assaultive.
"Then there were the filing of the charges and being assigned a public defender… and somehow in the midst of it all, she had lost her job.  It was no small coincidence that the man who raped her was also a local businessman, who was friends with her boss.
"To make things worse, there were accusations of her being a prostitute.  
"She had met him at a party where there was alcohol and illicit drugs.  She was accused of drinking (which she admitted to) and taking the illegal drugs (which she denies partaking of).  Either way, she was accused of promoting the overt sexual tension because she was wearing a little black dress and high-heeled shoes. While, of course, the rapist was not drinking or taking drugs because he was an upstanding family man in a business suit, who testified that it was she who seduced him."
His explicit account of the story indicated that she was the agressor while maintaining that he was the victim.

Davison said, "Even though he said that she never asked him to pay her for the sex, he said that the whole rape accusation must have come about due to an unsatisfied customer who refused to pay her later that evening, and she decided to go after the only person in the room that she might have made a handsome profit off of. An old prostitute’s blackmail trick from the annals of the oldest profession. She was accused of trying to frame him by filing charges, because the rest of the men there were, 'losers,' and everyone knows you can’t get blood out of a turnip.

"She said that her public defender told her, 'If we go forward with this, there is a chance that both his story and your story might make it to the media outlets… You have to decide if you want to be reading these statements about yourself in the headlines.'

"Not wanting to be the subject of public ridicule she decided to walk away…"

What would you do?

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Public, Private or Home Schooling?

By Shirli Kieffer

An associate of mine proclaims that one of the biggest conspiracies in our society is to control the masses through education and media to embrace mediocrity, complacency and to dissuade individuals from attempting to aspire too high, so as not to upset the one-percent applecart.

A popular method used for controlling the masses is to encourage families to hand over their children to the public school system. Parents are led to believe that The State will ensure that their children will receive a quality education. Bertrand Russell once said, "The government distorts the minds of the young and calls it education."
According to John Hospers, “More affluent upper-middle-income families could send their children to pri­vate or parochial schools, which in thousands of cases provide the child with a far better education in 'reading, writing, and arithmetic' than the public schools do. But the parents are forced to pay a high price for this act: while paying tuition to send their children to the private schools, they must also pay taxes to support the public schools which they do not use; thus they are doubly penalized. If there ever was an obvious case of injustice, this is it. Their indignation is, again, understandable and entirely justified. Why should they be forced to support something they want no part of and of which they disapprove?”

Socialization is hailed as one of the greatest advantage of schools. This is the place where the child picks up the rudiments of social skills that help him survive. But in truth, a regular school-going child can interact only with his peers. He may bully younger children or fear older ones. He does not know how to behave with an adult. This is because in the school environment he interacts only with his peers. A homeschooling environment brings in a more natural social environment.
A regular school going child cannot read literature. He cannot keep silent or think in depth about any one thing. The artificial 'busy'ness imposed upon him by the school disallows quiet contemplation. Rowdy and destructive behavior, as seen among peers, is more noticeable in school-goers.

There is little long-standing knowledge among regular school goers because most things are learnt for the exam. There is no correlation of facts with life. The child may know a lot, but understands very little. This is where the homeschoolers beat the regular school goers. Ultimately, homeschoolers emerge more adept at facing the outside world.
Homeschooling may seem like a lot of fun and freedom from the outside. However, things are seldom as simple as they seem. Homeschooling is a lot of added responsibility and hard work. But, if successful, it will forge a strong bond of love and respect between parent and child, while providing your child with the best form of education he needs.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

A Relationship is a 100/100 Partnership

It’s not 70/30, not 60/40, not even 50/50. A true relationship is 100% them and 100% you.
You cannot give half of yourself and expect to get all of your partner. It just doesn’t work that way.
If both of you are not fully invested in the relationship, it is a dying relationship.
Love can’t flourish if it isn’t given the effort it requires to grow.
Don’t play games to get more out of your relationship.
If you can’t be true to yourself and get results then things need to change.
Healthy relationships require effort and if you and your partner aren’t 100% committed to the others’ happiness, then you’re wasting each other’s happiness.

“100% them and 100% you”

Friday, November 15, 2013

10 Secrets of Highly Effective Liars

SECRET #1: Have a reason to lie (and lie no more than needed)

The bad liars tell lies even when they do not have to, then have to cover up lies with even more lies. Eventually they told so many lies, cannot keep their story straight, and their lies are exposed.

The good liars lie just enough to achieve what they need.

SECRET #2: Lay the groundwork

Liars who have worked out their story beforehand, instead of extemporizing (i.e. making it up as they go) enjoy far more success with their lies. As always, practice makes perfect. It also helps them be consistent (see Secret #5)

SECRET #3 Tell the truth, but presented in a misleading way

Technically, half-lies are not outright lies. They did tell you the truth, but in a way you thought the statement meant something else.

SECRET #4: Know your target, and tailor your lies

Good liars can get inside listener's head, not literally of course. By using empathy, a liar can pick up what the listeners want to hear, and avoid hitting trip wires that will trigger their suspicions.

SECRET #5: Keep your facts straight

Successful lying is hard because you have to be consistent. If you say one thing at one time, and another thing at another, then people will catch you in a lie.

SECRET #6: Stay Focused

How committed is the liar to the lie? Most people find lying unpleasant, and when they finish lying they felt relief. Good liars, on the other hand, enjoy lying, and feels no shame or remorse.

SECRET #7: Beware of non-verbal signals

The bad liars fidget when they lie. The really good liars can control their non-verbal cues, thus NOT giving away their lies.

SECRET #8 Turn up the pressure

Raise the emotional stakes when the target becomes suspicious, to distract the target.

SECRET #9: Counter-attack

Most people are uncomfortable accusing others, and this can be used by a liar to their advantage. By attacking the critics, the liar can force the critics back on the defensive, by introducing doubt. Was the critic really justified in doubting the liar? Uh...

SECRET #10: Bargain

Good liars can often "bargain" their way out of a jam, even when they were caught in a lie, by eliminate feelings of responsibility for the lie. This is often done by passing it onto someone else, or pay off those who were offended.

ref: For "10 secrets of an effective liar", see Psychology Today / Extreme Fear Blog / Top 10 Secrets of Effective Liars.

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Forever Bea - I married a psychopath in search of my soulmate

I've had the honor of working with Bea (pronounced "bee") Davison on her story, Forever Bea.

In her book, she tells us about her lifelong quest for love. Even though she was raised in a commune that exercised free love... there was something inside her that longed for something more... a soul mate; that one person who is uniquely suited to spend the rest of this life with.

Early in life she meets Jesus, leading to her first vocation in Christian ministry with her young husband in tow... As her story unfolds, we see that going about the work of god may not be as godly as one might think, as we witness Bea's struggle with lies, deceit, infidelity and betrayal...

And that's just the beginning...

After battling the powers that be, she reinvents herself and starts exercising her entrepreneurial skills building her own corporate conglomerate, that leads to more challenges and those in search of ill-gotten gains. Romance is the key to her corporate takeover struggles...

Reinventing herself, once again, she embraces her computer skills, starts a company and seeks romance, both using the power of the Internet. After all, the third time is a charm, they say...

This time she finds her one true love... He has three children, she has three children and they combine their families to create Bea's ultimate ideal of bliss...

Until the family's youngest sibling joins the Army and is subsequently killed in Afghanistan, then all hell breaks loose!

Bea's previous struggles give her the raw skills to face the demons that rear their ugly heads...

We all can learn from Bea's facing adversity head-on and refusal to be beaten under any circumstane; not only to survive but thrive.

Available in paperback and Kindle

Saturday, July 6, 2013

Top 10 She's Just Not That Into You:

Top 10 She's Just Not That Into You:

How can you tell if she’s just not that into you? C'mon guys, this is not rocket science... but since you asked, here are the top 10 things to ponder if you think the current object of your affections may not have you as high on her priority list as you think you'd like to be...

1. She doesn’t bring you coffee in bed

Okay, so it might not be specifically bringing you 'coffee in bed.' This could be exchanged for any unique, thoughtful act of kindness that she does specifically for you and no one else. If she's not doing something especially nice for you, she's still looking for the right person to do something special for.

2. She makes plans that don’t include you

We're not talking about her regular meeting with her female-friends after work. It's a given that you both should have time with your friends while you're seeing each other, that's healthy. But, if she's taking vacations, spending the week with, "a friend," is spending time shopping for something huge, is going to shows or concerts without you, then there's a good chance that she’s just not that into you.

3. She has ex- hang-ups i.e., “My ex used to, so I…”

Talking about the ex- is a relationship killer anyway, but if she ever compares you to her ex- then that is a clear indication that she already envisions you as being an ex- in her near future also. Don't feel as though you were blindsided when she tells you she's moving on... She's probably actively looking for her "next" right now.

4. She doesn’t participate in your serious activities

You invite her to participate in your events i.e., an awards ceremony, ball game, jam session, public or private event, etc... and she more often than not has an excuse or something else to do... That's another red flag. If she was into you, she'd want to participate in all (okay, maybe not all) those things with you, because that's what we do, when we're into you.

5. She pays more attention to her cell phone than you

If you're trying to carry on a conversation with her and she's rarely looking up from playing "Words with Friends" or texting her girlfriends, this is a sign that you are incapable of holding her attention, and that likely is also true for her affection. She's waiting for someone to text her who is more interesting to her than you are.

6. She values the advice of others over conferring with you

If she's facing important decisions, or traumatic events in her life and she's seeking her advice from professionals or friends without asking you for your input... You guessed it: She does not value your opinion, or worse yet, may not trust you at all.

7. She doesn’t help you & covers up with, “I believe you’ll figure it out.”

What if you have issues in your life... and you've overtly hinted that you could use some input, support, or even some of her assistance in dealing with a pressing situation? If she shuns you with her expressed faith in your having the ability to handle it alone... then guess what? She doesn't care, and you are on your own.

8. She’s unmotivated, sexually, i.e., you go the extra mile, and she doesn’t

What takes place when the lights go out can give you a clear indication of what's going on inside of her. If your performance level is fairly high, and you're motivated to please her, even to be a little outside-the-box for her benefit; and she's not returning the sexual stimulation in kind: then there's a good chance you're just a temporary bed warmer.

9. She doesn’t reciprocate i.e., maintain a 50% investment in the relationship

Notwithstanding any strange financial debacle or huge gap in socio-economic circles, nowadays, it is perfectly fine for her to offer to pay once and a while, and if she does offer, then you should suck it up and graciously allow her to show how much she cares about you. If she's into you, she will gladly desire to pull her own weight. If you're always paying for lunch, better be aware that you might be just that; a free lunch... and that's all.

10. She’s not into your interests/activities, i.e., doesn’t sing (or even care to know) any of your songs

If you're a sports fanatic, even if she doesn't like sports, she will make an effort to get to know something about your favorite teams and players. It's what we do. If you're into her, you take the time to notice what spices she likes, what kind of wine she drinks, what stores she likes to shop at, and might even concede to watch some television programming that she prefers. It needs to be the same with you, too. If she's not a friend or a fan, or unwilling to even feign interest, then there's not much to look forward to.

Copyright © 2013 Shirli Kieffer, All Rights Reserved